The Trash Bag:

It is up to each of us to listen, to act, to do something. We can make choices we like easily, good choices and bad ones. It is harder to make choices that are frightening with ends that are unknown. But that is what faith is, you have to believe first before you see -- this is something that has taken and is still taking me a very hard and long time to learn to accept.

But you do see in the end - and what you see is more amazing than you could ever lay out or imagine on your human own. You fight, you resist, you ignore, you pretend the message is for someone else and not you, you pass it by, you come up with excuses, you put things off to the end, you lie... but in the end when you run out of options -- you cave. You give in. You say ok God --- and then you seriously start to pray.

You dream of standing in a star field with a black and very tattered and taped up trash bag full of everything that you think is important to you, taped and tattered at the cost of hauling it around and trying to keep it all together. And Jesus is there just feet away waiting for you to give it to him. With tears rolling down your face you start to do so... but at the last minute pull it back from him for fear of letting go.

You still feel sick. You still don't want to do this. You still don't believe all the way. You still miss what you had and are 'secretly' thinking of ways to go back. But in the end again - you cave, and say -- Ok God. You try and give the trash bag over again but you can't quite do it. You pray again.

You spend days in tears of not understanding why it can't be the way you want it to be, why does everyone else get what they want? Why do you have to give up everything your happiness and comfort, your all for someone else's sake?

You rage for days with this question, weeks, months... again and again. Then one dark and rainy night at three in the morning you are staring out a window. The night and the storm has made your heart quiet and still enough so you can finally hear the answer that has been being repeated again and again in all the noise you've been making: Jesus gave up everything he had too. He gave his life for you - not for himself. He gave up absolutely everything.

It shocks you to the core. Especially when you remember you are supposed to try and be like Jesus. Give and give and keep on giving - because you love. Even if you do not get anything immediately back in return, even if it hurts. You are supposed to pick up that cross and be like Jesus.

So you pray again. The whole time he is just standing there waiting for you to trust him, to give him that trash bag you carry of everything precious to you. Just waiting reassuring you it will be alright. He could turn it into something beautiful. And this time you do it. You had that trash bag over. With shaking hands and tears pouring down your face you step back and whisper "Ok God, I will stop fighting and trust you. I will do what you want of me, just show me."

And he does. Slowly at first, one step at a time, one breath at a time, your heart changes, your world starts to crack open and you start to see bits and pieces of a plan that had that has been made since before the dawn of time. Looking back on your life to this point you can see where the pieces had fallen into place and you didn't even know it then. You see the tiny bits of light that shine through are so bright and brilliant that you dare to hope -- and at last it comes spiraling open until you are on top of a flowered hillside looking up into a beautiful sky, remembering what you had and fought for and wanted for so long was not nearly as nice as this is -- and this is what you were fighting against being given. It is more beautiful than you ever could have imagined:

LOVE.

Love.

love.

This could apply in many more ways than just adoption. It might apply in every heart felt-battle you might have in your life.
Some people may just have to look harder to find that hillside and they may have to do it more than once. For me, it wasn't related to the idea of adoption either at first. But in this moment I felt I did need to write it here for that relation.

I saw this quote on another blog. It was so strong inside me that I had to share it again:

"What if there are children in the world who will suffer somehow because I failed to obey God? What if my cowardice costs even one child somewhere in the world his or her life?"
-- Richard Stearns.

What about Bella in the post below this one? And what about the others? What about the ones we might never know? Pray, post about them, have faith and believe. Bring one home if you can. Really sit back and ask yourself -- can you? If not can you pass word on about them? That is important to because together we can reach someone whom can.

This has been posted time and again on the internet, even one other time by me here on this blog - but I will post it again:



My friends, your thoughts and actions are always your own. You know your own roads and I cannot and will not even begin to try to imagine them. It's just that after years of trying to take the trash bag back, I felt the need to share mine as encouragement to someone out there. So many of you have encouraged me that I also wanted to say thank you. Until next time, in peace and have a good night.
--Debrah

Matthew 18:5:

"And anyone who welcomes a little child like this on my behalf is welcoming me."

One More Time in 2009...

...I feel the need to post it, you see, there are all these little children; millions and millions of them, world wide; each with a name, each with a face. Tonight on New Years, maybe think about a resolution to help them in any way you can, whether it be prayers, advocation, funding for their adoptions or even to bring one home...

One more time in 2009 I feel the need to post these kids pictures. Understanding that this blog is for all kids needing a home; these few here following -like so many others in their exact situation- will be institutionalized soon after they turn only four years old simply because they have some sort of disability, into places, where the workers at those places say for themselves, that are not fit for animals to live in. Clicking on the names below will take you to blog entries with more info and in some cases pictures of these children. One more time in 2009, it is my honor to introduce to you:

Ian, Martin, Mindy and Wallace - 4 little angels set to be transfered next month I think to an institution that they cannot be adopted from.

Dimitry, a sweet little boy whom is blind whom is said to have just turned four this past December.

This little girl, Mara, whom I am trying very hard to find a family for - you will see her picture posted in the sidebar of my blog, is ten. She needs you now and is blessed to be able to teach us so much through her Aperts Syndrome Condition; she is beautiful, and needs real love. Please, please someone think about saving Mara. There are plenty of labels on this blog that lead to entries about her, if you are looking for Aperts Syndrome Adoption, could she be your child?

Then there are all these children in the following video.

Make video montages at www.OneTrueMedia.com

Thank you, everyone, so much whom reads this blog. I am not at all condemning anyone here or trying for guilt, some people cannot adopt, I know, because am one of them. But I can speak out for these kids. Please think about them, pass word on, when and where you can or even bring one of these kiddos home, if you can. One more time in 2009, these are the faces of the red thread kids. Happy New Years Everyone, and God Bless.

"In you the orphan finds mercy."

Hosea 14:3

I always knew he was 'the man':

"Too many children in foster care are falling through cracks. Be a hero, take the time learn about adoption today."

--Bruce Willis

Found This Today:

On another blog that I follow. Yeah, I am a copycat - but some things just need to be posted again and again, thank you Amy for posting this. :)

A Special Child
by Sharon Harris

You weren't like other children,
And God was well aware,
You'd need a caring family,
With love enough to share.
And so He sent you to us,
And much to our surprise,
You haven't been a challenge,
But a blessing in disguise.
Your winning smiles and laughter,
The pleasures you impart,
Far outweigh your special needs,
And melt the coldest heart.
We're proud that we've been chosen,
To help you learn and grow,
The job that you have brought us,
Is more than you can know.
A precious gift from Heaven,
A treasure from above,
A child who's taught us many things,
But most of all-
"Real Love”

I Do - Part 2

Hi everyone,

Ok, this is 'the big one' for today, because it is about a topic that has been on my mind for a few days now, brought on by a conversation I had with someone the other day.

Back in November I wrote this entry, and more specifically from that entry concerning the topic of the conversation mentioned above, the following paragraphs:

"I don't want to leave this on that grim note. So, please join me when you read this in a prayer for all these children. About 7% of the Christian population alone can lead to no more orphans in the entire world. That's it. I read the site Over the Moon With Joy and encourage you to visit there. I have decided to join her prayers that adoption might be brought into people's hearts, that all these kids might come home.

And that is not to say only Christan's should adopt. Love is something that belongs to everyone everywhere. Its just to display a 'statistical measurement' of how few people it would really take. :)"

And that was the 'just' of the conversation had. Now, keep in mind, if you look around this blog - that I am religious. And there is this - just because someone doesn't choose to follow one particular religion or any religion for that matter does not mean their home would be any less loving than anyone else's.

Is it better to let them sit waiting in an orphan home NEVER knowing real love at all? Especially when there is a family for them?

I think believing is very important and it does help, yes, and I will never doubt or discourage what to me is a fact. But I will not discourage any family that steps out to get these kids. I encourage them very much. We've all heard it said that "Religion God accepts as pure is to care for widows and orphans." And so to step forward - in my opinion it can't get more believing that that.

And like I said back in November: Love is something that belongs to everyone everywhere. Wonderful families are everywhere too.

Thank you for your time.

This Says it All...

Thank you, from the bottom of my heart for making this video. This is beautiful. He is a beautiful little boy. They are all beautiful kids and this entirely needed to be shared and seen. Also, if you would rather it not be posted here I will remove it at your asking. :)

"...thats the beat of a heart..."

"Not flesh of my flesh, Nor bone of my bone,
But still miraculously my own.
Never forget for a single minute,
You didn't grow under my heart - but in it."

~Fleur Conkling Heylinger

Legacy of an Adopted Child

Once there were two women Who never knew each other;One you do not remember, The other you call "Mother."
Two different lives Shaped to make you one;One became your guiding star,The other became your sun.

The first one gave you life,And the second taught you to live it;The first gave you a need for love,The second was there to give it.
One gave you a nationality,The other gave you a name;One gave you talent, The other gave you aim.

One gave you emotions,The other calmed your fears;One saw your first sweet smile,The other dried your tears.
One sought for you a home That she could not provide;The other prayed for a child And her hope was not denied.

And now you ask me Through your tears ...The age old question,Unanswered through the years. Heredity or environment ...Which are you a product of?Neither ... my darling ... neither, Just two different kinds of love!